Children’s view of trust begins as soon as they are born. They are taken out of the only world they know, which is warm, comfy and
quiet to a world that is foreign and frightening. The examination table is hard; there are all kinds of strange noises. People are poking and grabbing them. It’s up to the parent to instill a sense of calm and trust, and let their child know that they are safe.
Here are a few important steps to fostering trust in your child.
Physical Contact
It’s widely known that skin to skin contact is fantastic for your newborn. The warmth of a mother’s body comforts and relaxes the infant. As the child grows older, hugs, kisses and holding hands become extremely important for developing trust.
Words Of Endearment
Simply telling a child that you love him unconditionally lets him know that he is safe, secure, loved and cherished. Even before a child learns what the words mean, the inflection of the tone reassures and calms the baby.
Routines
It’s very important to establish routines as early as possible. Routines are made to have a specific response each time they are done. At the end of the evening if a child is given a bath, read a book, given a bottle and put to bed, he will associate this with his bedtime routine. Now, when he is put into the bath, he will start to anticipate what will come next. Trust is established when the things that the child anticipates happening, actually do.
Limits
Limits help children make good choices. Knowing that parents expect them to act in a certain manner gives children guidelines for current and future situations.
Even very young children should start to learn the difference between right and wrong, that way it will be easier for them to understand the distinction as they grow older.
Consequences
Firm, fair and consistent consequences are vital as well. If your child knows that you disapprove of a certain action, and does it anyway, there must be certain consequences that are established and known to your child. Punishment is not meant to hurt or upset a child; it is to help him by letting him know that he is important enough to discipline.
Communication
Talk to your children. Even babies and toddlers benefit from frequent verbal communication. Encourage conversations. Be patient and respectful of your children’s feelings. You don’t have to agree or even debate with them, but be considerate when explaining your rules.
Keep Your Promises
When you tell your child that you will be at his soccer game, you need to show up and be attentive. Don’t talk on the cell phone constantly or work on your laptop when you are there. Enjoy this time in your child’s life and don’t let him think that he is an inconvenience.
By following these steps at the earliest stages in a child’s life, mutual trust, respect and love is established in the household. When home is a safe haven for a child, the world in general seems to be more loving and accepting.
