Make it a year to remember, cross off at least one thing on your personal “Ten Things to Do Before I Die” list. Me? I always wanted to write a book, climb the Himalayas and learn to salsa. So what’s left? Oh, just the things I’m lousy at, like curbing my appetite for carbs or resisting the urge to book two air tickets to my dream island, all on my credit card.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been dreaming of dropping two dress sizes and here I am still, well into my middle years, unable to achieve what other people find relatively straightforward.
For a start, if you gave me the choice of one marshmallow now versus two marshmallows later what do you think I’d do? Come to think of it, what would you do? An individual’s preference, believe it or not, says a lot about that person’s degree (or lack) of self-control.
Trying to break bad habits, in fact, is nothing new. Hundreds of years ago, the Babylonians ate and drank to excess, smoked, grew obese and frittered away their money. They were also the first civilisation on record to talk about New Year’s resolutions. One of their customs was to return something borrowed from a friend over the year just passed.
A common resolution among Romans was to seek forgiveness from people they had wronged the previous year while other cultures opted for fireworks, processions and masks. The idea was to cleanse one-self of the past and start again afresh.
These days we do the same thing, but a tad less ostentatiously. But do these resolutions work? The answer, typically, is no and willpower and lack of motivation are the most common stumbling blocks.
Willpower, What Willpower?
People who go through the trouble of making when, where and how plans are more likely to make their resolutions come true. People who plan are less likely to see their goals fall apart due to unhelpful states of mind, such as being tired. For example, making a regular date with a friend to attend a specific yoga class is a more successful strategy than simply vowing to stretch more often.
There are also two kinds of motivation – positive and negative and ideally, it’s best if both are working for you. First, there is the positive motivation of how good and brilliant it will be once you have achieved your goal.
Secondly, it helps if not achieving your goal is a big negative in your life.
Top Up Your Motivation Tank
There are many experts who believe that willpower and self-discipline can be depleted by attempting too many lifestyle changes at once.
We all know people who’ve tried to quit smoking, drop a dress size and become a fitness fanatic at the same time – and watched them fail. Willpower is more than just a metaphor: we deplete it if we tax it too much. It’s preferable to exercise self-control with small steps so that you gradually develop the inner strength to become the “new you” you want to be.
Blood glucose levels are helpful for keeping our willpower strong. Don’t try to diet when you’re tired.
The everyday stresses of modern-day life, which are often emotionally and physically depleting, could explain why all-encompassing health drives so often fail. Sometimes, as the parlance goes, “Life just gets in the way.”
Know Yourself
So what to do? Studies of willpower highlight the importance of making a goal relevant to you and your life. If your resolution is to get fit, for example, and you hate going to the gym with a passion, the silliest thing you could do is sign up for an expensive gym programme. It would be smarter to target other ways to increase physical activity instead. Why not walk to the shops and carry the shopping home, learn to dance, go running or take up some other physical labour.
Most importantly – and I’ve learnt this along the way to achieving multifarious goals – enlisting the help of friends, colleagues or experts as we tackle lifetime bad habits is bound to give us a better chance of success. You don’t need everyone in your life to know that you’re determined to beat your sugar addiction, but it helps if there’s someone to whom you can vent and who can remind you to “get back on the bus” when you’ve temporarily fallen off the wagon.
Anything is possible, you know. You simply need to want it badly enough. Further encouraging news is that the more efficient you become at curbing your urges, the better you become at exerting willpower in other areas of your life. So make a plan, get practicing, and prove to yourself that you can.
Popular Resolutions
Can you spot a resolution that “speaks” to you among these perennially popular decrees?
Get On Top Of My Finances
With the recession taking its toll worldwide, it isn’t surprising that many will resolve to get their finances in order in 2010.
Handy Hint: Start saving. Only spend money you have. Diminish your debt. Tighten those belts!
Spend More Time With Family & Friends
A lot of us feel we don’t spend enough quality time with those we love. So pick up the phone and start arranging experiences that you can do together.
Handy Hint: Like this idea? Send an e-mail invite to a picnic in a centrally located park. Everyone brings food and drink – and a smorgasbord of catch-up relaxation results.
Get Fit
Visualise yourself the way you want to be and promise yourself rewards along the way. Get into the mindset of “No excuses!”
Handy Hint: Make a date with a good pal to walk once a week for 50 minutes – and take your first baby steps to better health.
Lose Weight
With the increasing number of overweight people, weight loss remains a popular New Year’s resolution.
Handy Hint: Don’t stop eating the things you love, just eat them less. Watch your portion sizes with resolve, daily, and the weight will drop!
Quit Smoking
This is a hard habit to break because nicotine is extremely addictive.
Handy Hint: Don’t determine to give up smoking when other aspects of your life are stressful. Wait until you’re in a good space – and get plenty of emotional support to keep you on track.
Learn Something New
There’s nothing more esteem-building than getting an additional qualification under your belt. Your career options widen, you meet new people and you exercise your brain.
Handy Hint: Community colleges offer a plethora of inexpensive courses. Remember: nothing ventured, nothing gained!
I Want To Help People
The world shrinks into a smaller global village with catastrophes reaching us daily via the media, so it’s no surprise that “volunteering holidays” are booming worldwide.
Handy Hint: If time is an issue, donate furniture, clothing and other household items for those less fortunate in life than you.
I Want To Get Organised
Whether it’s your home or office, almost everyone wishes they had better systems in place.
Handy Hint: Take one untidy aspect of your life and draw up a plan to get on to it. Give yourself three months to see improvement.n
