ASK A THERAPIST

I cannot shake off this sinking feeling that my friends find me annoying and don't like me. I am 20 years old and always feel like I am on the edge of breaking down. What should I do?

The problem you mentioned seems related to your inner feelings. You need to ask yourself if it’s just ‘my feeling’ or have I heard it from my friends. If it’s your own feeling then you need to build your self-esteem through self-assurance and self-love. Do you find yourself annoying? If yes, then you need to indulge in some self-exploration and figure out exactly which part in you feels annoying to you. On the other hand, if you have heard it from your friends, you can talk it out next time with them and observe your relational dynamics with them.

How do I stop being so agitated and angry all the time? My mom says I have no patience and scolds me for my behaviour but I cannot help it. I am 16 years old and quarantined at home.

We are all passing through difficult and uncertain times and it’s not easy to be quarantined for an indefinite period. It’s okay to feel agitated and angry once in a while as we feel these emotions when we don’t like or cannot accept our reality. Find healthy outlets for yourself such as maintaining a journal and exercising. Follow a routine even if you are home all day. Indulge in conversations with your mom and express yourself openly through them. Find interesting things to do to keep yourself busy such as online courses and group activities.

I cannot get myself to fulfill my work deadlines these days. I just want to sleep or stream something senseless. How do I motivate myself to get anything done?

Take a break if you are finding it hard to stay motivated and focused. A change in your routine may revitalise your mental energy positively. Your motivation can come from the importance and relevance of your work. Give yourself five reasons why completing your task on time is important and three consequences of not meeting the deadline. Hopefully, this will bring your focus back on track.

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